by Garret Kramer
Not long ago, I gave a seminar to a group of football players, coaches, and parents. After the talk, one of the coaches approached me and asked: “How can you speak for over an hour straight with no notes?” This question, and my answer, pretty much sums up our methodology here at Inner Sports.
Believe it or not, in order to communicate clearly and have an impact—on one person, twenty, two hundred, or a million—the words and intellectual theory presented are, for the most part, irrelevant. The feeling behind the words is what people will remember and draw upon. When an audience, team, or individual is addressed by rote, or a memorized script, there is little chance for a genuine connection to be made. On the campaign trail two years ago, for instance, President Barack Obama moved many Americans with the rhythm of his rhetoric, not his political perspective. Much like when we hear a good song on the radio, he knew that people would be attracted to the harmony (the feeling), long before they appreciated the message behind the lyrics (his words).
The best communicators provide a feeling first and let the message follow.
The reason for this, I think, is that the best communicators, teachers, and coaches understand that human beings do not respond productively when they are told what to do or how to do something. In speaking from their heart—not dictating from their intellect—influential orators allow the audience to draw their own insightful conclusions in their own personal way. You may have noticed that since he has been in office, the president’s “fact-based” speeches have become extremely structured. So, in communicating via the teleprompter and not his gut, his ability to touch the American public (and his popularity) has declined.
Similarly, last week I went to the funeral of a friend’s grandfather. There were two eulogies presented. Both individuals spoke in the most reverent of terms. One speaker used prepared words; the other, no notes at all. The speaker with notes made nary a mistake, while the “no-notes” speaker often paused, searched for words, and stumbled. As the latter spoke, however (in spite of the mistakes), the emotion in the sanctuary was overwhelming. This tribute came directly from the heart and the speaker’s inherent wisdom; it came from love, so we were all swept away.
Regardless of your words, to instill a message, you must speak from an elevated mind-set.
The lesson here is far deeper than debating the pros and cons of scripted presentations. Virtually all of us are aware of the importance of communication—in the sports world, it is clearly essential for success. Yet, few of us know that true and enduring communication does not come from the spoken word. It comes from the truth or sentiment behind the words. Here’s the reason that some coaches put the most well-thought-out game plan together and don’t succeed, while others don’t strategize at all and still win: What a coach says–or a player hears—is merely an “echo” of his or her mind-set at that moment. Regardless of the quality of the game plan, elevated states of mind lead to understanding, competiveness, insight, and victory; low states of mind initiate judgment, confusion, false conclusions, and failure. Plus, when we restrict our own instincts and feel for the moment (follow the script), our ability to reach others will, of course, diminish as well.
If you are a coach, captain, parent, or leader of any kind and you want to have a real impact, don’t get me wrong; I certainly appreciate the need to prepare fully. Just remember, no matter how educated the message might be, it will always “get lost in translation” if you are not open to the possibility of making some insightful adjustments. Or, more importantly, if you and your audience are not in the proper state of mind (clear, still, determined) to discuss the matter in the first place.